The illusion of sleeping in …

It’s one of those days when I don’t have to get up for work until 6 and the hubs wakes up at four. If you’re a light sleeper like me this is not a good thing. I rarely slept through the night when my children were small. Every time one of them rolled over or sighed I was running to check on them.

I’m not blaming my husband, and will admit he tried. He tossed and turned, flopped around like a fish on dry land struggling to slip back into the murky sea of slumber…

But sleep continued to elude him. Soon anger crept into his movements. Finally, he gave up. He flung off the covers and walked softly across the room. He aimed for stealthy, even closed the door softly, but a ninja sneak-master he’s not. And I heard every breath and  whispered curse.

I kept my eyes closed, rolled onto my stomach and did my best to feign sleep. My plan was to fake myself back into the land of nod. I silently repeated all the calming words relax, slumber, rest, yeah you know the drill.

I lingered in the in-between stage, yearning for five more minutes – until my eyes popped open. And still, I fought the urge to rise. While watching the ceiling fan blades circle around, I bargained with myself.

You’ve got a long day ahead, at least try. You’ll feel better if you get even another half-hour. Take deep soothing breaths in and out, in and out.

Epic fail… I’d lost the illusion of a quiet, peaceful, sleep-in until daylight morning. I scooted upright against the headboard, wrapped my arms around my knees and heaved a long drawn out sigh. It was no use. I was wide awake and couldn’t convince myself otherwise.

I was unhappy about the circumstances but I realize it’s frustrating to suddenly come wide awake at pitch dark o’clock for no reason.For the sake of my marriage, I wouldn’t mention any of this. But, I wondered what dreamland adventures I’d been cheated out of.

Then I decided enough with the lollygagging. I swung my legs over the side of the bed and smiled. I’d shower, and drink my first cup of coffee on the back patio. I rarely had time to enjoy a glorious sunrise these days.

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